cnn: you are a joke.

a joke is what you are, cnn.

as i'm sure many of you have noticed, the cnn homepage has turned into somewhat of a sensationalized headline front. this is embarrassing. more embarrassing, but hilarious at the same time, is that you can now buy t-shirts from cnn with their already-chosen headlines of the day. just a few examples of recent headlines:

"can you see jesus' face in cat fur?"

"olympic athletes tested...for gender"

"air guitarist loses toe in stage dive"

"meet japan's 73-year-old porn star"

so i guess check it out

HOLY FATHER'S DAY

meet bill. meet luke. meet the two stupidest people on the planet. oh, and, happy father's day?

to really grasp the "lowness" of their iq's, be sure to watch the clip in it's entirety. happy father's day?? QUESTION MARK.

go commando

today a woman sued victoria's secret for an injury sustained while trying to put on a thong.

(item in question is the 'V-String' from the 'Sexy Little Things' line of lingerie. Item above is the 'Peek-a-boo V-String' from the same line.)

so what really happened? well, a "decorative metal piece" flew off and hit her in the eye.

wait, who buys underwear with metal attachments?

oh...my.....god....

tonight, at 9:33pm pacific coast time, i have found my true calling. well, maybe not quite. BUT, i can now successfully highlight the link between my college major with the superficiality that is red carpet obsession. shall we call it celebrity geography? the geography of fame? the mapping of v.i.p's? the geography of the rich and famous? actually i like that one:

the geography of the rich and famous.

page six.com (new york post gossip section) features the STAR MAP....oh my. so you click on the star on the map and it tells you who the celebrity was and what they were doing.


maybe this needs to become a national mapping project. this is going so many steps too far. s-t-a-l-k-i-n-g. awful? or amazing?

dude ben...

that's just weird.


ben affleck hangs with some young ones at a children's charity event in calgary, canada. i don't get why he didn't just stand up and take this photo. that way no one would notice that his head is maybe three times the size of theirs. and please, that cheeeeeeesy smile?

political jeopardy

hannah montana: what is the capital of montana.

nba

talk about social awkwardness.